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Change: Are you Blocking it?

Change: Are you Blocking it?

change
Photo by wallyir at Morguefile.com

Yup, change can be challenging.

It may be inevitable, it might happen every day; that doesn’t mean it’s comfortable.

Nine times out of ten it’s not entirely unexpected. Something will come up to indicate change is on the horizon.

Sometimes challenges are presented as old wounds or fears getting triggered. Sometimes you begin to feel resistance to activities, people or situations that used to light you up.

Are you aware of the signs? If so, how good are you at instigating the actions needed to move towards change? If not, have you developed habits designed to resist change, which now stand between you and the life you desire?

It takes conscious, mindful attention to work with the flows of energy moving through your life on a daily basis. You’re not meant to be a static, stationary being. You’re designed to travel dynamically through life, exploring and tasting the variety of sensations and experiences offered each moment.

The following are a few common habits that may be keeping you from making changes in your life that lead you towards your goals and desires.

1) No change in the ‘same old, same old’ routine:

Albert Einstein said, ‘The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.’

It’s not always easy to recognize when you’re approaching things from the same angle, because the problem or situation may at first appear to be different. For example, some people leave one (unwanted) relationship to find themselves immediately in another, ‘better’ one. The situation might appear different (the partner has changed, the home may have changed, etc), but if you haven’t changed the way you approach the act of relating and the recurring patterns that caused issues in the past, you’ll quickly find yourself in a very familiar situation.

In other words, the common denominator in all your life experiences is YOU. It’s not easy to look at ways you’ve blocked yourself from changing, because it often involves facing some ‘dark’ stuff you’d rather not face. It feels easier on the surface to ditch the whole situation and start fresh. Everything seems peachy when it’s new and apparently problem-free. It’s called ‘the grass is greener…’ syndrome.

To see if you can shift your perspective and allow new, unforeseen potentials to show themselves, start bringing consciousness to the challenges in your life. See if the act of looking at things from multiple angles allows for things to change in miraculous ways, with minimal effort and discomfort. Take responsibility for your role in challenges and be willing to look at how habitual patterning may have contributed to each situation.

2) Using your mind to ‘logic it out’:

Brains are truly amazing things, however, they don’t have all the answers. Humans minds are full of inter-generational beliefs, wounds, projections, collective norms, and all kinds of other goodies that get in the way of creatively feeling your way to a solution.

Sometimes you don’t want to face impending changes, so you ignore the urges in your heart and soul and rationalize reasons not to change. It feels easier to push through discomfort or deny pain by thinking it out rather than feeling it out. That’s okay, it’s natural to want to avoid hurtful situations or revelations. Eventually the urges to change knock a little louder until you’re forced to listen.

A combination of mind and heart is the best mixture to solve any problem.

When you drop the need to be right or the need for external validation and access your heart’s wisdom, you’ll find the two work beautifully in harmony. Your ego finds all kinds of fun ways to present blocks as ways to keep you safe. Habits that are so deeply ingrained feel like fixed aspects of who you are. When you trust your feelings as a guide, you can distinguish the sound of the fear-based ego from the voice of reason that dwells deep within.

Step back from trying to solve problems and see what happens. In the act of surrendering rational thought, you leave room for other solutions to present themselves.

3) Hanging out in the relative safety of familiar fear:

There are so many things we’re taught to fear, and still other fears that develop as we explore different experiences in our lives. In holding on to stories of past hurts, failures and disappointments, you can develop a whole slew of reasons not to try new things. You might learn to avoid certain choices that potentially lead to pain.

Once you shift your perspective to encompass a broader view, with every experience as a vital lesson in your expansion, you move from fear to enthusiastic engagement with life. When you acknowledge and integrate wisdom from past experiences, whatever arrives is different. It reflects the inner changes you’ve been through to clear away old patterning and beliefs, and allows you to grow in new ways.

If you fear you’ll only draw the same pattern to you and experience the same disappointment, you’re in a state of constriction that more or less guarantees you’ll find what you expect. This is not to say you deserve ‘bad’ things; it’s to say that your belief in your story perpetuates it. This is a habitual safety zone. As much as it might bring ‘undesired’ situations to you, it is a familiar energy that some part of you has deemed safe.

To shift from it, you can rewrite your old stories to incorporate the lessons and wisdom of the old and leave the rest behind.

4) Not following through:

Are you full of great ideas and consistently create wonderful things, only to find you give up if they don’t receive the response you’d hoped? Do you fill pages with cool ideas and never begin the projects?

This is also rooted in the comfort of the familiar, that safety zone where it feels easy and secure to dream up ideas but not to put them out in the world. What fear is behind this? Is it a fear of rejection that holds you back? A fear of success? It’s a good idea to look at what’s blocking your ability to follow-through. What’s happened in your life that’s left you feeling like the world isn’t safe for your creations?

Looking at patterns, wounds and early experiences can help uncover the roots of the block. Perhaps an offhanded comment by a parent or teacher inadvertently left you feeling inadequate. Perhaps consistent messaging from someone you admired led you to believe that you were undeserving of success, happiness or love.

Wherever the root lies, ask yourself if it’s really true. You’ll know by how you feel. Most likely, the root is something projected onto you by another and accepted by part of you as the truth. This has then been used to keep you safe from proving it to be true (which is the fear).

5) The Art of Self-sabotage:

The habit of self-sabotage can stem from multiple reasons (or excuses), and manifests in many different ways. Think of addictions and rationalizations as ways to sabotage yourself from making changes. What about habitual descriptions of yourself (or another) in one way which avoids looking at other sides of the story?

Fear of the unknown, of failure, of success, of intimacy, of connection, of disconnection; all of these can lead to self-sabotage that keeps you from facing the underlying fear. These fears may be yours, or they may have been instilled by someone or something external, and adopted by you as part of the truth.

What does self-sabotage look like?

It can look like avoidance of a person, task or issue that causes unwanted feelings to arise. You might find 101 reasons not to do something and no reasons to do it. It can look like making busy work a priority over connections with others or soul-fulfilling work. There are many ways it can show up in your life, and you’re the only one who truly knows how it looks to you.

Look at your daily tasks and habits to see if they’re in alignment with your true needs and desires. Anything that feels like it’s filling a perceived hole or masking a problem without addressing it may be self-sabotage. Chances are, it’s only exacerbating the underlying issue.

Sometimes all that’s needed to instigate larger shifts is a small change in perception.

Big Love,
~ Jenny

* I am the author of this post. You might find the original version, which was used with my permission without attribution, on Your Earth Angel (yourearthangel.com) *

Change or Spiritual Awakening?

Change or Spiritual Awakening?

wave; change
Image by © Royalty-Free/Corbis

Change is one of life’s constants; there is no being on this planet that hasn’t experienced it in one way or another, every day of their lives.

Not all changes are created equal.

Some feel easy, like a gentle curve in a country road, leading in a new direction. They flow into and out of your life with little commotion, leaving you feeling fresh and invigorated.

Others blow through your life like a tempest, tearing you out of the comfortably familiar sameness and razing the foundations on which you’ve built your life to this point. They’re destructive, cathartic, and life-changing.

These are the changes where you know you’ve reached the point of no return. You walk away feeling raw; transformed by the process of being stripped soul-level naked, knowing that life will never be the same. Like a phoenix, burnt by the flames to be born anew in the ashes.

A Reinvention of Self and life

These are the changes that challenge you in ways you didn’t know existed. They may lead you into the darkest shadows of your soul, through poverty or into a grief so deep it feels bottomless. They offer you the opportunity to face your power, to access the parts of you you’ve buried, perhaps for lifetimes, under the status quo and the many ways you’ve tried to ‘fit’ into external structures and definitions.

These are the changes that ask you to face the truth of yourself and of what you’ve taken as reality. They force you to question everything you’ve ever known, and to be prepared to surrender the things you thought were fixed (including your personality, your stories, and who and how you are in the world). They move you, they mould you, and they transform who you thought you were.

These changes can have many names: catharsis, dark night of the soul, rock bottom, turning point, tipping point, crisis point, or psycho-spiritual crisis. It’s all the same thing; that point at which something in you decides the way you’ve been going is no longer working. It can feel traumatic, or easy, depending how attached you are to the way things are and have been. These are the changes that thrust you into a spiritual awakening.

They come in all shapes and sizes and can be triggered by a multitude of things: relationship breakups, the death of a loved one, or hitting rock bottom with an addiction. They look different to each and every person who undergoes them.

The Spiritual Component

The thing these changes have in common is that they feel significant in a way that’s difficult to articulate. They often involve recognition or intervention of a higher power. You feel connected to something outside of the 3rd dimensional, physical reality you see, hear and touch.

There is regularly a sense that while this feels like one of the worst times you’ve been through, there’s something larger at play offering immense expansion and fresh perspectives. Afterwards, the emerging feelings of freedom and newness reiterate this sense that it may have been the best thing that’s ever happened, in spite of how challenging it felt at the time. There’s an acceptance of the challenges as aspects of your empowerment, and a deep inner knowing that this has transformed your worldview profoundly.

In every moment of life’s challenges, you’re given opportunities to awaken buried parts of yourself that lead to more expanded and empowered ways of being in the world. You’ll be shown new perspectives which felt unattainable from your previous, limited perspective. They were always there, you just couldn’t see them from where you were.

The Gifts of Change

You’ll find you approach problems or relationships in new ways that in turn transform the way others relate to you. A deep and all-encompassing compassion and love sets in and flows to all of existence. Perhaps you discover a desire to spread that love in some way. You may feel tuned in to intuitive messages that guide you more lovingly than your ego mind and ingrained beliefs.

call
Photo by imelenchon at Morguefile.com

As if the changes you’ve been through weren’t enough, you may find a desire to move to new places or new ways of supporting yourself arises. It may even feel like a calling, a desire so strong and undeniable that it becomes almost obsessive.

Anything less than passion and joy doesn’t feel like a good enough reason to do anything. You may grow bored with things you used to enjoy, and your soul longs for deep connection and meaning.

Sometimes, you feel cast adrift, seemingly alone for months or years as your soul does its work to integrate the constantly flowing wisdom and insights moving through your newly-cleared channel.

The choices you make may appear crazy, ridiculous or terrifying to others, such as leaving a permanent job with no alternative and moving to a new country. You might begin to discover you have gifts in healing, intuitive arts or psychic mediumship. Synchronicities like numbers lining up on clocks and other electronics become beacons that light your way.

You in all your Glory

Your whole worldview has shifted, to incorporate multi-dimensional aspects of yourself that were always there, lurking in the shadows until you were ready to recognise them. The changes that came like a whirlwind through your life served as a mode of delivery, so that whatever higher power exists for you could remind you of your most expansive, delicious truth.

In the moment you surrendered to the change, you said yes to the adventure that waited. You opened the door for radical transformation to blow through your life and offer you expansion and infinite potential.

Once you accept that a profound shift has taken place within you, you’re called to take responsibility for aspects of yourself you may have denied or discarded along the way. They may be called ‘positive’ or ‘negative’, yet they all feel the same to you. In those things are pieces of your power, lessons learned and growth acquired that have shaped you and changed you. You may discover you feel softer, more open and connected to everyone and everything in a way you’ve never experienced.

The yearning begins for connections with people who really ‘get’ you. You’ll listen to your heart’s intuitive knowing to find those with whom you share a soul bond. You might begin to feel frustration that old friends and family don’t ‘see’ you, or feel the need to distance yourself from them for a while.

It may start to feel like the way you saw the world before was a strange and surreal dream, a long-forgotten story about someone else’s life. When everyone else around you still believes the ‘dream,’ it can feel confusing. You might get pulled back into the old for a while, until it feels untenable.

Change as Rebirth

This change will feel like a complete rebirth, as if you’re building your life from the ground up. The old foundations of understanding and self have been destroyed. It’s challenging to stand in a place filled with infinite potential when you’re used to a more limited worldview. How do you choose, when there are so many things to choose from?

Perhaps it also helps to know there are no wrong choices. You can try something on for a while and reject it if it doesn’t work. There’s a freedom in the process of deep change that opens you up to flow. Until you develop a trust in yourself and the new, you may be pulled back into old, familiar choices and habits, because they’re all you knew, before.

The beauty of the process is that you’ll recognize when things aren’t serving you because you’ll feel the dissonance in your whole being. Whereas once you might have whole-heartedly believed that what you got was all you deserved, you know differently now. You don’t know how you know, but you do. You have an understanding that whatever came before offered you the chance to learn and grow beyond your perceived limitations.

The changes in your life might not be immediate. You still have to eat and pay bills. You may want to spin magic 24 hours a day, and that can lead to frustration when the old reality infringes on the new. Nothing will ever be the same, but it might on the surface look the same.

The Power of Change

As you stay aligned with the newness of your experience, you find new ways of approaching situations arise and open up more possibility. The surrendered state you experienced during the process serves you well afterwards, too. You develop a deep and embodied sense of trust in your own knowing that guides you towards every decision.

Remember this, if nothing else: there is no one way to navigate a spiritual awakening. There are many resources out there offering support and guidance if you choose to follow the process towards deeper understanding. Movement can help, and finding other people who’ve undergone a similar experience. Looking for an intuitive healer or counsellor can help with integration of the immense amounts of energy you’ve moved through your bodies. You’ll know what you need, if you’re willing to pay attention and trust.

The process is truly beautiful. If you allow yourself to be transformed, you’ll never look at life the same again.

Big Love,
~ Jenny

* I am the author of this post. You might find the original version, which was used with my permission without attribution, on Your Earth Angel (yourearthangel.com) *