As I was walking this morning, it was made clearer to me the difference between judgement and blame, and getting clarity for your own expansion.
When we name a ‘problem’ in our lives, or acknowledge that someone has abused or mistreated us, it’s so that we can accept responsibility for our healing and growth, NOT to demonise the challenges and become victimised by life. EVERYTHING is a teacher.
For instance, I can say ‘my ex was a narcissist’ and stop there, lamenting the fact that I wasted years with an unfeeling, manipulative psychopath, or I can say, ‘why was that attractive to me? How can I shift my perspective to encompass a new way of being/feeling/loving that brings different experiences into my life? Where was I not loving myself that I allowed myself to accept other than what I desire/deserve? How can I give myself what I believed I would get from that other person?’
There’s always a pay-off. Claim your power and bring the gifts from the experience into the now. Celebrate the shit out of them and make them part of your arsenal of tools to serve the world. Leave the rest behind.